During April 2002 the Austrian arm of the Coca Cola empire decided to find a man to be the face of Coke Light (known to us as Diet Coke). A friend of Georg Backer, Lionhead's Senior Network Programmer, decided to put him forward. Votes would be cast on the Coke website, and, with Georg in complete ignorance, his friend Sophie e-mailed everyone at Lionhead to get us to vote for him.

Of course, we got on to our fansites and told them to vote, and the number of people voting for Georg grew by the minute. The result was a foregone conclusion. Georg won the web-vote by a handsome margin. This is also the first and last time the words 'Georg' and 'handsome' will appear in the same sentence.

Eleven of the finest specimens of Austrian manhood and Georg converged in Vienna on 23rd April. Here the real competition would begin. In front of an audience and a jury made up of celebrities (including the lovely Miss Austria), each competitor had to attempt The Trials.

Georg, surrounded by Austrian beefcakes with six-pack stomachs and biceps bigger than their heads, decided that brain would triumph over brawn. Whilst the others demonstrated their ability to pick up cars or ripple their pecs, young Georg recited a poem he wrote himself. Here it is.

THE VAMPIRES CHRONICLE OF COKE LIGHT

The story I am telling now is true,
you have to know I was once one of you,
living in your daylight empire
until I was chosen to die and live as a vampire.

No longer am I able to live my dreams
and it is even sadder than it seems,
no love, no joy, no beauty, just night,
but worst of all no more Coke Light.

Have you seen the windows so dirty at night?
Oh how I wish I could clean them half naked with one Coke Light,
but no - instead I am forsaken till the end of time
and never ever will the taste of this liquid be mine.

So I am just not more than a vampire
and will never be able to fulfil the desire
of the Ladies and serving as a knight
and giving them pleasure half naked with Coke Light.
Here the truth cannot be denied
even vampires love the taste of Coke Light.

(to read the full unabridged version click here)

This won much commendation, especially from Miss Austria, whose knowledge of iambic pentameter and scansion is second to none in central-European beauty pageant circles. So Georg breezed through the round. Later tests, which included handing out roses to the audience in an erotic manner, getting partially undressed erotically and dancing to a steel drum band in an erotic way were simple for Georg, who is a bubbling cauldron of passion at the best of times.

This could have been the future of Coke Light...

The result of this two-day festival of Coke Light-based eroticism, poetry and competition was that Georg came third out of twelve. His career as a model hasn't caught fire, but Coke's loss is our gain and Georg remains at Lionhead, older, wiser and perhaps a little sadder. And he hasn't drunk a drop of Coke Light since.

We'd like to say thank you to everyone who voted for Georg. Thank you to Sophie, whose idea it was and thank you to the judges for letting him taste the forbidden fruit of the modelling world, but sensibly preventing him from going further.

 

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